What is focus?

Still don’t get it. I have to dig deep. I’m still on the surface. And I know it. Every time when I get stuck like this, I’ll start with something else. Why isn’t it working? I think I’m trying, but maybe I’m not trying hard enough. Why can’t I have my focus? And if I have it, I loose it again? It’s temporary. A moment. A period. A swell. It’s something that comes and goes. I know it’s like a wave. It grows, breaks and then it starts all over again. I know there is no such thing as a forever consistency or permanency; and I don’t even want that. But wouldn’t it be great to have some more constant focus? That you just wake up everyday, knowing what to do? Or knowing what you want to reach that day and just make it happen? Wouldn’t it be so peaceful to know where you’re going? Step by step you come closer to this dream that you have. It’s not even a dream; it’s something you imagine. It’s a vision, an idea that you just have to turn into reality. I would feel so calm, to just know what I’m doing and why. To know where I’m heading. Trying to figure that out everyday is exhausting. Knowing you’re so close to catching that wave, but not being able to get it done, is frustrating. It can happen - I just have to make it happen. Like I have to push myself to jump on my board when the perfect wave is coming. After many fails, I can’t believe I’m actually riding the wave. The feeling is amazing. I float and I fly, and I’m being a part of the flowing water. I’m exactly where I need to be at this very moment. It’s the meeting of the time, the place and me that feels just right. I’m surrounded by the ocean - the beautiful soft but powerful blue - moving with the flow of the waves in such a natural way that I feel like I’m connected or even integrated in this earthy everyday spectacle. This strong connection with this very moment makes me feel free. It’s liberation from the pressure that time and environment can give you. No thoughts about the past, the future or another place. It’s all about me in this very moment. There are no distractions, but can I say that it’s focus? I’m back again to that question: what is focus? Getting on that wave and feeling free of any kind of pressure; it’s something that goes naturally, without thinking too much. It’s an act, without even realizing you’re doing it. So, can we call this focus? Isn’t focus more seen as something you have to push yourself to? Or is that just the wrong way to think about it? Isn’t it just about creating that environment for yourself so you can reach that focus? To go in that water, with the goal to catch the waves. To let everything else go; everything that can get you distracted from that goal. Not thinking about the cold water, the big crowd around you, the rocks underneath you or the chance of falling the next moment. Creating a mind set that allows you to reach that level of focus. Set your mind right and then you will reach that point of a flow. I’d like to flow all the time like I do when I’m catching a wave. To be stuck in it in a good way -without any worries or thoughts about anything that can push you off this focus. No doubts or fears: no questions. Is this what I want? What will happen after this very moment? What does this mean? What if I fail? How long can I keep doing this? Is that other thing may be better to do? How much I would have an organized mind. A mind with a sharp thinking without hopping from one thing to another. A mind that allows me only to think about stuff that matters; stuff that’s helping me to grow. A mind that filters the bull shit; stuff that may seem interesting or worthwhile, but is actually keeping you away from your real goal, your real dream. Wouldn’t it be great to have a clear view? To be able to chose for something with your whole heart and let everything else drop that doesn’t help you to work this out and then just go with the flow? To know that you don’t need to understand everything, but only the dream you’re working on? To learn to know what to let go and what to keep? How great would it be to make your life simpler because you have a clear focus? So you won’t feel like an overenthusiastic dog, reacting on every exciting new thing around him? How much peace you would experience when you can consciously grow without pressures. For me this sounds like a dream that I haven’t turned into reality yet.

Using Format